Jennifer Aniston Is Unhappy

Three, hundred, million dollars.

That’s how much Apple TV+ ponied up for two seasons, or twenty episodes, of their flagship streaming service series The Morning Show. And if reports and behind-the-scenes gossip are to be believed, Jennifer Aniston and Reese Witherspoon both nabbed $2m per episode as lead actresses and Executive Producers.

That’s more than Jennifer Aniston got for Friends. (That was $1m an episode.)

So why in the hell is Jennifer Aniston so unhappy?

First, let’s separate the narrative of The Morning Show from real life. In the highly fictitious story about a male morning show host who is fired after an article details his Me Too-esque affairs and power-positioning with female staffers (which doesn’t closely resemble any real life person, of course), Jennifer Aniston gets very unhappy. Actually, Alex Levy, her character on the show, in the narrative of The Morning Show world gets very unhappy. And why wouldn’t she? Her co-host just got fired, she’s concerned her career might be over with the kind of reshuffling that always happens after a scandal, and her marriage is on the rocks. Aniston spends most of the first six episodes of the series mugging sadly, gritting her teeth frustratingly, letting out those trademark Rachel “ughs” and flipping her hair angrily.

Where is James Lipton when you need him?

But what’s so ironic, is that Aniston is said to be just as unhappy in the un-narrative real world. But why?

First of all, we must turn our attention to Apple TV+, where the flagship show went through numerous iterations, fired their original creator, and went back to the drawing board on numerous episodes. There were legal fights behind the scenes that were reported in many outlets about trying to take away the Created By credit that the original creator of the show was still legally entitled to. Top that off with a company that doesn’t have experience in creating entertainment, and a CEO who is more concerned with being “nice” to others, removing drug references and questionable criticisms of technology from his originals, and Aniston was faced with a challenging situation from behind the scenes.

Yes, but why is she still so unhappy?

She’s just plain wired that way, unfortunately. Always second-guessing her choices, concerned about the perception of her and her talents on the other side of the Friends hysteria. In fact, old Friends episodes continue to bring her the majority of her dollars these days from streaming licensing deals. Even more than the dollars she nabbed for her unhappy performances on The Morning Show. She’s also super insecure, and the on-again, off-again relationships and marriages haven’t helped in that area as well.

Hell, Jennifer Aniston is a celebrity. And she’s just like you and me.

Unhappy.

Climate change is a real thing. The World is a disastrous, dying, violent place. We’re stressed, obsessed with devices that we think define our self worth, we’re angry and frustrated and entitled. That asshole in your office won’t stop saying shit about you. That boss is a lazy, good for nothing, lemming. There’s chemicals in our water and our food, aliens hiding in secret government bases, and the Sun is going to implode and destroy all life as we know it…sometime soon. I mean, life used to be simple and now it’s anything but. So, of course she’s unhappy.

But so are we.

So maybe it’s time to stop worrying about if your favorite celebrities are unhappy in an attempt to forget about your own unhappiness. Maybe it’s time for you to stop focusing on the flubs and mistakes and bad decisions celebrities are making and vilifying them for it when you’ve done things just as bad, or maybe worse.

Who the fuck cares if Jennifer Aniston is unhappy?

I mean…other than you.

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