Meet Bob, Harvey Weinstein’s Walker

Meet Bob.

Behind closed doors, but overheard at the courthouse where the Harvey Weinstein trial is selecting jurors that aren’t supermodels or actresses that have seen him in a bathrobe, it was revealed that Harvey Weinstein has a name for his walker that he’s been leaning on, carting around, and pushing aside in favor of clutching stairwell railings…

…and his name is Bob.

It’s no surprise that Harvey named it Bob, after his brother, since for years all that Harvey did was to lean on Bob about business issues, shove him on the ground when he was angry at the decisions he made, and make him sit in the backseat or the trunk every time they rolled up to another gala premiere in the city. Once, Harvey even made Bob carry around two tennis balls for his plantar fasciitis in his suit coat pocket just like his walker now has two tennis balls jammed onto the bottom of its two front posts.

According to a reputable online site that sells walkers, the main reason for someone to use a walker is to “help increase their ability to walk independently and safely, increase the amount and distance they can walk, and to decrease pain and discomfort while walking. The result of using a walker can be increased independence, self confidence and life satisfaction.”

Increased independence?

Self confidence?

Life satisfaction?

If all goes according to plan, Harvey Weinstein will find himself with less independence (i.e. jail), less self-confidence (i.e. no more botox or liposuction in jail) and less life satisfaction because, well…he’ll probably be in jail.

So then why walk around with Bob, his walker, if all the goals of walking around with a walker will generally not be the kind of outcomes Mr. Weinstein will end up with at the end of this very public court case?

Because Bob (his walker) keeps people from thinking about Harvey‘s indiscretions, and thinking about his injuries instead.

It’s ironic, because for years, this is exactly how Harvey used Bob at Miramax and then The Weinstein Company. According to folks who used to work there, Bob was always there to distract and placate while Harvey was just plain being Harvey. Harvey would create chaos and Bob would mop it up. Harvey would anger throngs of people and Bob would make it better. Harvey would do this and that and Bob would do that and this. Decades before Harvey got caught doing the unthinkable; before he was charged with the same, and before he supposedly had a serious surgery on his back, he was leaning on Bob for all sorts of things, and bending Bob to his never-ending black will of death.

So is it really a surprise that Harvey has named his walker Bob?

Do you know what the term anthropomorphize means?

It concerns the act of “giving human characteristics to animals, inanimate objects or natural phenomena. Sadly, as in the tragic Sea World attack, the proclivity is forgotten as we wonder why the animal behaved like an animal. Obviously, the tendency to anthropomorphize is a source of error.”

Historically, anthropomorphizing has been treated as a sign of childishness or stupidity.

Nicholas Epley, Professor of Behavioral sciences at the University of Chicago

Harvey doesn’t just think he’s alone now; he is alone now. And so, in an attempt to regain self-confidence, or some sense of the power he once wielded, he has anthropomorphized his walker and named it Bob. I’m no psychologist, although I have seen Psych many times, but this is clearly the one thing that Harvey is holding on to, in an attempt to hold onto a past that is quickly dissolving before his eyes.

We don’t mind that he named it Bob. We just think in today’s day and age there are far better, hipper names he could have gone with. Spencer? Or Tucker. Or Scott. Bob just feels, oh I don’t know…old and useless.

Of course, maybe that’s what Harvey wanted. Maybe it’s all he’s got left? Maybe hanging onto that walker is the difference between his sanity and his complete and utter collapse?

Call it Bob. We don’t care what he calls it. Or if he uses it. Or when he carries it or when he opts for the stairs. We don’t care why he’s using it, where he got it, or what surgery he had that necessitates it. We don’t care what brand it is, if there are tennis balls on it, or if it can fit in the back of that luxury town car that takes him back and forth to the courthouse.

No. We don’t care about that. Not in the least. We just want the motherfucker sent to jail.

He can bring Bob with him..

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